GENWiki

                               Space Travel

                                     Copyright, Adam Poszar, 1990.

            "Crap!" Captain James yelled, ripping off his headset
        and violently throwing it behind him toward the roof of
        the ship's cabin.  "Darned static, almost broke an ear
        drum!"

            His copilot, Android A14A, silently nodded while
        casually tracking the gravity-free trajectory of the
        headset across the interstellar freighter's cabin.  It
        gradually slowed as it stretched to the end of its coiled
        telephone-like cord.  A14A watched it stop briefly in
        center-cabin before beginning its return.

            Captain James was intently studying the control
        console readouts.  "This is the third time our
        communications equipment has gone haywire this trip," he
        said.  "Navigation computer's gone, too.  Wouldn't you
        know it, just as we're reaching the edge of our own solar
        system, too.  What I wouldn't give for a new Intergalactic
        radio transceiver and a rebuilt navigation system."

            "Duck, Sir."  A14A announced.

            Captain James turned.  "Wha...?"  he managed as the
        headset ricocheted off his right temple and into the
        control console.

            "I said duck, Sir."  A14A repeated.

            "Duck your butt!" Captain James barked, annoyed at his
        own mistake.

            "This is impossible, Sir," A14A answered,  "I am not
        so equipped."

            Angry silence prevailed as Captain James' attention
        returned to the controls.  "There's a planet coming up.
        Quickly A14A, read the starmap and tell me what it is.
        Earth system, outer orbits.  And hurry!"

            The android hastily removed the pouch from its pocket
        next to the seat.  It read UNIVERSE: THIRD QUADRANT,
        SECTION H, SUBSECTION O, EARTH SYSTEM, Scale = 1
        centimeter per light/week.  The android carefully pulled
        the badly worn map out of the pouch.

            "Hurry up, you overrated can of superconductive
        microcircuits!"  James shouted.  "We're already in its
        gravitational pull!"

            His words caused the android to jerk, ripping the map
        into three pieces.  The center piece floated up and away,
        stopping at the ceiling of the cabin.

            "Brass brain!" Captain James yelled, unbuckling his
        safety harness and floating after it.  His motion caused
        the pieces of the map to float along the cabin roof, away
        from the control console.

            "This is incorrect, Sir," A14A replied in its metallic
        monotone.  "My central processing unit is of the latest
        design using the most advanced ceramic microchip
        technology.  There is no brass involved in its
        manufacture, Sir."

            Captain James snatched at the map and stood inverted
        on the cabin ceiling, scanning it feverishly.

            "Three point seven seconds to impact without
        engagement of the third starboard lateral thruster within
        one point four seconds or less,"  the flight control
        programming unit announced as the planet loomed.

            "Crap!"  Captain James screamed, flailing wildly,
        trying desperately to swim through the gravity-free
        artificial atmosphere.  "Engage!  Engage!"

            "Impossible, Sir." A14A flatly stated.  "I am not so
        equipped.  It is impossible for me to engage crap, Sir."

            "We're gonna hit!"  Captain James wailed, pulling
        himself back into his seat.

            "Hit, Sir?"  A14A asked.  "Hit what?"

            "We're gonna hit Uranus!"

            "This is impossible, Sir.  I am not so equipped."

• * * *

            "EarthBase Interstellar flight control."

            Sam Barker grabbed the phone before the end of the
        first ring.

            "Damn!" he sighed into the receiver.  "Okay.  Yes.
        Okay, I will."  He hung up the phone and reached across to
        press the button on the speakerphone.  "B14B," he said.
        "Read to me the navigation records on the return flight of
        Arcturian freighter number seven oh oh three."

            "Problem, Sir?"  the sensuous feminine voice asked.

            "We lost it on the outer edge of the solar system."

            "Shall I bring in the insurance forms and the shipping
        papers, Sir?"

            "Please.  Wait!  I'm curious.  What was the
        freighter's cargo?"

            "Its that new trading company, Sir.  Their initial
        shipment.  I'm scanning, Sir.  Cargo description.  Here it
        is.  Microelectronics, Sir.  Intergalactic radio

        transceivers and navigation systems.

            Barker sighed as he fell back into his chair.  "Well
        screw me silly."

            "I'm very sorry, Sir," android B14B's sensuous voice
        replied, "This is impossible, Sir.  I am not so equipped."