I've sometimes felt, as life goes by, that there are too many sides with me that nobody but me will ever know, and I've felt that there are sides with me that I don't see. Many people think I'm just a dreamer, a lazy boy, but I'm not. I just feel that too many people let their life go under, too many people spoil their lives, just because they don't know what they want. And when I see you, I see such a person. A person who doesn't want to see himself in the mirror, a person who wants to be someone else. It scares me to see you in that way, because I don't know if my wishes for you will ever become true, and I don't know what you really want. You've changed, I can tell. From the very first moment I met you, you've changed. And you've changed in a way I know, because you've changed much the same as I did, and I still do. But I've had hard times, times where I don't know what to do, times when I just can't stand having other people around, times when I just want to go into my self and think. See what I can do to change this rather grey world. Because I can't see any good point living the life we do in this world, where every thought is counted as profit or loss. I can't see any humans around, just walking creditcards with much or little money. And I don't think I like that, and neither do I think you do. Correct me if I'm wrong, but I've just seen to much of you just as I think others did see me.
But there is one side I can't face, and thats the side of saying
nothing. I don't know how you manage it, sitting there at school, receiving a test, and seem to bother less if it went well or not. No, because what I see then, is a human, trying to become a machine, a machine without feelings for it self or for people. What I see is a human, trying to be a machine which just thinks in profit or loss. I don't want this to happen to you. Because that wil never lead to any good, nor will it lead to any true happiness. You've got to let out your feelings, even if other people are watching you. Why should you hide your self? You're born to be a human, not a heartless machine. I want you to see the sun go down one night, and see it go down as a beautiful thing, not like a loss of profit because of the loss of day. So if you get a good result, live it out, and enjoy it as long as you may. And if it goes bad, learn from it, but do not forget to live it out as it deserver. Because you'll get over it, you will.
So, when you have read this little thing, do whatever you want to
do with it, ignore it if you truely want to become such a machine, like those you see around you every day, or learn from it, and be a human. But remember, whatever your choise may be, I'll always be your friend. Even if you deside to disable your feelings, and disable your chance to be one.