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archive:humor:manager

MANAGERESE ENGINEERESE

Adjust schedule Slip schedule Advise Order Ambitious Unlikely Aggressive Very unlikely Challenge Frustration; a dirty job nobody wants Compatibility Impossibility (see "Transparent change") Contribution Anything a manager likes Controlled introduction Let the customer do the CA Couldn't reach consensus Total disagreement Critical path Something that only a short project can be on Diagnostics Something that might give us a clue Dynamic Unstable Elevated to mgt. level Dead Encouraged Ordered Encouraging process No tangible results Exciting Frightening Functionally complete Can do something that appears to work for

                                                 any feature

Growth opportunity Learning experience Helping people Telling people what to do Historical Nobody remembers why Inappropriate Stupid (see "Non-optimal" and "Stupid") Individual contributer Regular grunt engineer Interesting Bear in mind the Chinese curse "May you

                                            live in interesting times"

Issue Problem (see "Opportunity") Learning experience Mistake (see "Growth opportunity") Less than candid Baldface lie Leverage Borrowing someone else's problem New opportunity Surprise Non-optimal Inappropriate Opportunity Problem Pessimistic Most likely to occur Positioning problem No one will buy it Power down Trip over the power-cord Project transfer Start project over again Quality Japanese; otherwise not well defined Redirected In some contexts: cancelled;

                                   otherwise: start again

Resource constrained Not getting done (see "Time constrained") Revision Same software version but from another tape Richness Overwhelming complexity Scenario Fairy tale Significantly reduced subset Castrated Stable Stagnant Strategy What we tell ourselves we are going to do Strong personality Intolerably obnoxious Strongly encouraged Ordered on pain of death (see "Encouraged") Stupid Incredibly stupid (see "Inappropriate") Suboptimal Inappropriate Tactical plan What our customers tell us we are going to do Time constrained Already too late (see "Resource constrained") Time frame A period of time in which something

                                 will not occur

Transparent change A change which introduces only subtle problems We You 

/home/gen.uk/domains/wiki.gen.uk/public_html/data/pages/archive/humor/manager.txt · Last modified: 1999/08/01 17:14 by 127.0.0.1

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