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      USEFUL FARSI PHRASES FOR AMERICANS TRAVELING TO THE MIDDLE EAST

AKBAR KHALI-KILI HAFTIR LOTFAN.

      Thank you for showing me your marvelous gun.

FEKR GABUL CARDAN DAVAT PAEH GUSH DIVAR.

      I am delighted to accept your kind invitation to lie down on the floor
      with my arms above my head and my legs apart.

SHOMAEH FEKR TOMOMEH QEH GOFTEH BANDE.

      I agree with everything you have ever said or thought in your life.

AUTO ARRAREGH DAVATEMAN MANO SEPAHEH-HAST.

      It is exceptionally kind of you to allow me to travel in the trunk of
      your car.

FASHAL-EH TUPEHMAN NA DEGAT MANO GOFTAM CHEESHAYEH MOHEMA RAJEBEH KESHVAREHMAN.

      If you will do me the kindness of not harming my genital appendages I
      will gladly reciprocate by betraying my country in public.

KHREL, JAPEHEH MANEH VA JAYEH AMRIKAHEY.

      I will tell you the names and addresses of many American spies
      traveling as reporters.

BALLI, BALLI, BALLI !

      Whatever you say !

MAMNOUNAN GHORBAN IN DAFAYEH MEEMUNAM.

      It is with greatest pleasure that I sign this confession of capital
      crimes.

TIKEH NUNEH BA OB KHRELEH BEZORG VA KHRUBE BOYAST INO.

      The water-soaked bread crumbs are delicious, thank you.  I must have
      the recipe.

ETEHFOR'AN, DEHRATEE, OTEGAH SHOMA MIKRASTAM KHE DO HAFTAEH BA BODANEH SHEEREL TEEGZ.

      Truly, I would rather be a hostage to your greatly esteemed self than
      spend a fortnight upon the person of Cheryl Tiegs.

MATERNIER GHERMEZ AHLIEH, GHORBAN.

      The red blindfold would be lovely, excellency.