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archive:fun:aj-life3
                 Life Sucks III: Life in the Real World
                 ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
                  Author: Robert A. Seace (Agrajag/AJ)
                  ====================================
               Published by: RLunatic/Jhayden pro-ductions
               -------------------------------------------

Introduction ############

Yes, yet ANOTHER installment in the pathetic ongoing saga of

life-loathing and random bitching… Back because YOU asked for it. (Well, not really… Actually, it's back just because I felt like bitching some more. I don't really give a rat's ass about what YOU want.) Yes, now there is an entire TRILOGY of bitching and whining about the suckiness of life! Enough to make even the most hopeless optimist suicidal!

In this third book, I examine the Real World and all of the

Suckiness therein. Other than that, it will be pretty much like the previous two books: lots of bitching and moaning and complaining about things I can't change. The only change will be the focus of my complaints…

The Real World ##############

No, I'm not talking about the brainless MTV show where they

get a group of idiots to live together in some loft for a few months until they kill each other… I'm talking about that especially sucky portion of life that comes after we are all grown-up and out of school and actually earning money at some sort of job… Now, to some of you this may actually sound like a GOOD thing. Well, if it does, then you obviously haven't actually experienced it firsthand yet. It is NOT a fun thing. Sure, you are actually out on your own, no longer controlled by your parents, and are free to do basically whatever you want. However, if you do the wrong thing out here in the Real World, the consequences are MUCH more severe than they used to be back when you were living with your parents or going to college…

If you didn't feel like going to classes for a week at

college, no one gave a shit, and it wouldn't really do you any major harm since you could likely just catch up by reading a few chapters in a few books (hell, I've had classes where I only showed up in class to take the tests, and STILL aced the class)… However, in the Real World, if you don't feel like going to your job for a week, you will be in some SERIOUS trouble. If you are lucky enough not to lose your job, you'll likely at least lose a week's pay. And, while that may not sound that serious, believe me, you need each and every last CENT of the money you earn just to survive. The loss of even a DAY'S pay will completely screw up your entire budget for the next month or so…

When you were living at home with your parents, and you ran

out of cash because you blew it all on something unneccessary, the only thing you had to worry about was not being able to buy more unneccessary things. You were still assured of being able to have a place to sleep and plenty of food to eat. However, out here in the Real World, if you blow all of your money on something unneccessary, you may very well find yourself going without such things as food and shelter until your next paycheck…

So, in general, there is very little allowance for screw-ups

in the Real World. Certainly a hell of a lot less than there is in college or at home with your parents…

Finding a Job #############

Ok, the first thing you have to do to become part of the

Real World is get a job. Sounds easy enough. It isn't… You may think you will have no trouble at all finding a job. After all, you'll have a degree in XXX from YYY College, so there should be TONS of companies knocking down your door to try to snatch up you and your skills! Heh. Nice delusion, but nothing near reality… Jobs are very difficult to locate. And, a GOOD job is damn near impossible to find. So, if you are still in college, start searching now. Don't do like I did: wait until after you've actually graduated and then begin searching.

I fully expected to find a fantastic computer programming job

that was close-by and payed me an ungodly amount of money in a matter of a few weeks… After 3 months and hundreds of resumes, I luckily stumbled onto a good job in Boston (I lived in northern New Hampshire, some 3 or so hours drive away), which payed a moderately low salary… But, it was definitely the best thing I had seen or was likely to see anytime soon, so I snatched it up. Luckily, I've grown to love it, which is a very important thing. If you don't like your job, you should definitely be hunting for a new one as soon as possible. There is nothing worse than being stuck your entire life in a shitty job that you hate. Life is bad enough on its own without the added suckiness of working at a job you don't enjoy…

Finding a Place to Live #######################

This sucks...  It's generally not too hard just to find

available places to live, but it's definitely hard to find one that is within your price-range. And, any place that is cheap enough to afford is generally a dump. So, to find a really good place may take a consiberable amount of time; probably as long or longer than finding a good job… The problem is, you usually don't have that much time to find one. You usually will need one RIGHT NOW, and won't be able to predict that you will need one a few months from now. When you get a job, you will need to re-locate there (assuming you aren't one of the extremely lucky people who finds one close to where they already are). And, there is no way of knowing in advance where exactly "there" will be until you actually get the job (unless you narrow down your job-hunting vicinity to a single place, which would be truly stupid). So, when you finally get a job in East Timbuktu or wherever, you need to move there NOW. So, the result is, the first place you live in will generally suck or will be so expensive as to completely drain all of your money… Or, both… And, of course, there will likely be a lease, so you can't move out if you happen to find a better place once you are there. So, the trick becomes finding a good place, with a rent you can afford, and timing it so that you can move in there as soon as your current lease is up…

Getting to Work ###############

So, you've got a job and a place to live.  Chances are that

one is not within a reasonable walking distance of the other, so you will need some method of transportation back and forth between them. Either you can have a car and all the bills and troubles associated with them, or you can do the public transportation thing. I'm not sure which one is worse…

Cars are fine if you've got nice cheap, reliable beast, and

live/work in some small town where the people don't drive like idiots and there aren't a lot of car theives waiting to swipe your vehicle (or you have an old, ugly beast that no one would want to steal). But, for most people, this isn't true. And, even if it is, you still have the normal maintenance costs, and gasoline to buy (especially important if you DO have an old, reliable beast of a car), and the occasional major repair. It adds up pretty quickly…

Taking public transportation, on the other hand, is pretty

cheap, compared to having a car. However, there are other problems associated with it Mainly, having to deal with the other people who are taking public transportation. Some of these people (and, for some of them, that is using the term "people" quite loosely) are just plain strange… I've seen more weird people on Boston buses and subways than I've ever seen anywhere else in my entire life (and, I've lived my entire life in New Hampshire, which is loaded with tons of strange people). On buses, I've seen people who just start randomly singing and/or talking to no one. I've seen others who look like they belong to the special effects department of some science fiction TV show. I've seen others who look mean enough to chew through lead pipe. I've seen others who just come up and start talking to you like they've known you your whole life (and the really scary ones actually know things about you)… There are some truly STRANGE people who take public transportation…

And, aside from the problem of weirdos, public transportation

is also slow as hell and not very reliable. There seems to be little relation between when a bus is scheduled to arrive and when it actually does. And, the time that it takes to get where it is going seems to vary greatly with each trip, which makes predicting when to leave so as to get to work on time next to impossible. There have been days where I get to work an hour early, and others where I get there an hour late, but yet I left my apartment at exactly the same time, both times…

Paying Bills ############

This truly sucks...  How I hate paying bills.  It is a truly

sucky experience to see the money you've just worked so hard all week (or two weeks in my case) for disappear in a matter of a few minutes as you pay various bills… Rent, phone, electricity, gas, cable TV, student loans, credit cards, etc., etc., ad infinitum… There just seems to be no end to them. You just pay one, and another one arrives to suck away a bit more of your money. And, after paying them all, you MIGHT just be lucky enough to have enough left over for luxuries like food… In fact, in order to pay them all, you may find yourself resorting to using things like credit cards, which will just put you further in debt and increase your bills each month. A truly vicious circle…

Socializing, Dating, and all that Jazz ######################################

Well, this sucks whether in the Real World, or in college,

or wherever. But, at least at college, you could find time for some socializing (if you wanted to; I had plenty of time to, but just never wanted to). Here in the Real World, there just isn't much damn time for anything except work. My average day consists of: get up at 5:00am, shower, drink coffee, play on the Net for a while, get to work at about 8:30am, work straight through the day usually taking no lunch break whatsoever, head home at about 5:30pm, eat (finally), watch TV for a bit, then go to bed around 10:00pm or 11:00pm… Not really too much time for socializing of any sort. Then, on the weekends, when I do have time, I'm usually dead tired, and just want to sleep and/or relax to make up for working so hard all week. Of course, even if I DID have the time, I probably wouldn't do anything; socializing is not my favorite activity, and I'm too damned shy to ask out any women I'd want to go out with… But, that is an irrelevant side-issue…

The Things that DON'T Suck ##########################

Is there any part of living in the Real World that DOESN'T

suck? Sure. You are after all on your own, free to do pretty much whatever you please. You are making your own money and are responsible for keeping yourself alive, which can be a pretty satisfying experience. (Though, in a split second, I'd trade in that bit of satisfaction for a free and clear few million dollars…) Plus, you are now out there doing something important, and contributing to the society as a whole, and making a global impact on the world… Or not…

Conclusion ##########

Well, I'm not sure what the message or point of this book is.

But, I'm sure there is one in here somewhere… But, basically, I'm just saying that life sucks; and, even more so when you are out in the Real World. But, as usual, for all its Suckiness, life is still worth living. Even though it is quite often painful and hateful and completely unfair, it is still far better than the alternative…

So, if you haven't yet entered into the Real World, enjoy

the comparatively easy life you are currently leading… You may think you have it hard now, but be thankful that you aren't out here where life is a whole hell of a lot harder…

And, if you are here in the Real World already, then you have

my sympathy and understanding… But, don't think that you are the only one this is happening to; everyone goes through it. Your troubles aren't any worse than mine (not many people's troubles are worse than mine) or most others. So, stop whining and feeling sorry for yourself, and go out there and live the least Sucky life that you possibly can… And, when life comes up and kicks you square in the crotch, just remember that no matter how bad you've got it, at least you are alive… And, at least you aren't me…


Send comments, complaints, gifts, flames, bombs, : Rob Seace threats, money, food, naked pictures, body parts, : Agrajag source code, jokes, quotes, alcohol, etc., to… : ras@world.std.com


"Life, loathe it or ignore it. You can't like it." - Marvin

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