Another First for ICM
The Inoperable Computer Machines (ICM), which recently (MODERN DATA, April 1983) made headlines with its introduction of a truly third generation computer, has again illustrated its pioneering spirit by developing a radically new employee performance appraisal procedure. By reducing the appraisal process to a simple chart scheme, shown below, the ICM has enabled the manager to recognize quickly the strengths and weaknesses of his employees.
_ Performance Degrees _
Performance | Excellent Very Good Good Fair Unsatisfactory
Factors | (1 in 15) (3 in 15) (8 in 15) (2 in 15) (1 in 15)
| Far Exceeds Exceeds Job Meets Needs Does Not Meet
| Job Require- Require- Job Improve- Minimum
| ments ments Require- ment Requirements
| ments
_ Quality | Leaps tall Must take Can only Crashes Walks | buildings a runnung leap over into into | with a start to a short barns walls | single leap over garage | bound a house _
Timeliness | Faster As fast Slower Slower Dances
| than a as a than a than a on
| speeding speeding cannonball freight three
| bullet bullet train feet
_ Initiative | Stronger Stronger Stronger Shoots Has the | than a than a bull than a the aroma of | locomotive elephant bull bull a bull _
Adaptability| Walks on Walks on Swims Passes Needs
| water water in in weak a
| emergencies water water bath
_ Communica- | Talks Talks Talks Argues Loses tion | with with to with those Skills | God angels himself himself arguments _