[*] [ An addition to: ] [Real Sysops and Unreal Board Crashers] [ Real BBS Users ] [*]
Written By The Master Watchman of The Encounter (619) 433-7075
Well, as inspired by The Silver Elf,
I have decided to make an addition to the lists. Hopefully it will get at least a few laughs. (Especially to us Real Sysops!)
Real users do not scan all the boards and read all the messages looking for something exciting.
Real users post occasionally something of interest which does NOT include:
Backspacing tips Messages saying "Just taking up space" Messages asking for E-Mail Messages saying "Got some new stuff .. Send mail." Messages telling about "A Micro- modem for sale! $215" or Messages saying they will trade a MM for an Apple-Cat in working condition.
Real users don't try every command on the main menu, then try them again to see if they do something amazingly different.
Real users don't automatically assume The Sysop will be there all the time, and don't get annoyed and press Ctrl-G 10,000 times when he's not there.
Real users don't expect the Sysop Stat message to say anything but "Not available"
Real users don't constantly bug The Sysop for levels.
Real users do things to deserve levels.
Real users do not leave stupid questions in feedback or messages and expect answers.
Real users do not look for important people in your user file and then start supporting them and sending them E-Mail hoping to pick up some great tips or be recognized as a "Real Pirate" from them.
Real users are not poor.
Real users do not expect The Sysop to remember everything they have ever said, Real users understand that they are not the most important figure on the board.
Real users do not command search. (I.E. A,B,C,D,E,F,G,H,I,…,!,@,#,$,%,^,&,*)
Real users read the system news when it has been updated so they don't have to command search.
Real users have long since printed out the menu and other things so they do not have to continually return to them.
Real users do not call right back after their time is up.
Real users are not afraid when The Sysop answers the phone. Real users will at least acknowledge that they are there.
Real users don't expect the board to be up all 24 hours all the time.
Real users are not terminally boring.
On the War board: Real users do not create stupid wars like "Pepsi vs. Coke".
Real users are not afraid to post with their name. Real users hardly ever post anonymously.
Real users enjoy killing unreal users with Commodores who post that their toy is best.
In fact, real users do not reply to Commodores, they find out their address and destroy their house.