ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLM NOP QRS TUV "How To Choose An Alias" WXY ZAB CDE FGH written by IJK LMN OPQ RST The Sheister UVW XYZ also known ABC DEF as GHI JKL UMass Bandit MNO PQR STU VWXYZABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWZYZABCDEFGH
Most people when they make their 1st attempt at choosing an alias to mark their computing "career" tend to reach for the obvious, lets take a look…
Never include the word "Master" any- where in your alias because most likely you are not. Master connotates some- thing that you have total control over which, of course, most of the dweebs that are modeming nowadays dont. Of course there will be exceptions and some of us will tend to be "masters" but the word "master" is so overused that its not feasible anymore so keep away from that. If, however, you wish to include the prefix "Mastur" some- where in your soon-to-be-famous alias, then that is solely up to you.
Data…now that leaves a lot of doors open. It would seem that a lot of people would have chosen that by now, but apparently not. I guess it is because you can only make several alias out of that: Data D00d, Data Leech,
Data Man, or Data Dweeb.
Now, you tell me why you shouldnt use the word "Data" if you can help it. Even if you could think of a decent alias using the word "data", why would you want to be known as a chunk of info? Be my guest, use it, Im not your dad.
I think its quite obvious why you should not use any of these in your new nickname. As Ive said before, most of you skinny wimps are NOT dudes nor do you resemble 1 in the slightest way. Im sure that a number of you more elite users are completely inherent of the "Dude" aspect but that would just cause people to question you, wondering whether or not youre a rodent. If you want to use "Dude" then I suggest you prove it rather quickly.
"D00d", on the other hand, is quite
self-explanatory. Let the rodents of the world use "D00D". That way we can identify them more easily and kick them off all of the Boards. A rodent is a rodent is a rodent and will always be one. Never let one trick you into be- lieving he's changed, especially if he used "D00D" in a previous name.
Well, I just consulted Websters Un- abridged Dictionary and their defini- tion of "Digital" is as follows:
1. Of, pertaining to, or resem- bling a digit, or digits. 2. Digitate. 3. Performed with the finger. 4. Using numbers that are digits to represent all the variables involved in calculation. 5. Showing the time, temp, etc. by a row of digits rather than by numbers on a dial <eg. a watch>
Well, as far as #1 goes, I dont think that any of you would resemble a digit except the number one if you are skinny enough or the number eight if you are fat enough. If you resemble any other number then youd better get to the doctors fast. Now, number 2, ok, if you can visualize yourself "digitating" then have fun, be a fool. Number 3 kind of makes me want to laugh, and very hard at that. Well, if you pick "digital" for this purpose, then I suggest you be careful with the other half of your name. People may wonder just what it is you are actually "fingering". Then there's the 4th def- intion which is fairly feasible, seeing as computers and variables form a comprehensible interaction. As for #5, unless you plan to be a meteorolo- gist then youd better skip it.
Dont knock it though, Ive seen some
decent names with "digital" in them, Digital Madness being one of them. If you are so daring as to use it as a noun then you would be telling every- one that you wish to be thought of as:
a finger, a key on an instrument, or the last joint in a spiders leg.
Ive spent enough time on this one, so on we go.
Everybody and his brother thinks of using the word "disk" somewhere in their alias, but thats so unoriginal. I mean, shit, thats the first thing you touch when you decide you want to use your computer. Well, some of you wierd people might touch something else, but Im speaking for the majority of us. If you didnt have a disk then your computer would be worthless as far as enjoyment would go, unless youll enjoy the money you get from selling it. Im sure therell be some "Masters" that disagree with that, but lets see how much fun you can have without disks. You get my point.
Creativity stands a chance here.
This is one of the few words though, that when utilized in an alias that is out of context, can still sound fine. For Example, "Slipped Disk" or "Disko Dude" <see "Dude"> are acceptable.
One of the less imaginitive words to use. I fell under this category at one point. Coming from UMass (University of Massachusetts) I merely added the word "Bandit" on the end of my schools name, how ingenius. I did that mainly because I wanted to represent my school somehow and that would be the only way to use UMass without sounding too queer or ornate. Im not so sure how my newer alias is, but its not an ordinary every day word.
As I was pointing out, "Bandit" is a
word that people use to make you think that they are some mysterious pilferer, whether it concerns Pirating, Hacking, Phreaking, or anything connected with the greyer areas concerning legality. It seems, in my opinion, to be too easy to merely tack on "Bandit" at the end of your name. One name that has become somewhat noteable is "Apple Bandit". That mustve taken a lot of hard thought time and effort to create that alias. Think about what Ive just said if you were deciding whether or not to be a so-called "Bandit".
Unfortunately, this touches upon the "Master" concept. If you cant crash much more than say, a D-dial, then it stands to reason that using any form of this word in your name would cause you to be frowned upon as some derivative of the word "geek". If all you can crash is A-Net then you should go back and consider the word "Bandit" because even a user in diapers knows how to do that and youd merely be "Bandit"ing someone elses techniques. If you have the know-how to crash many types of systems then youre still at a loss be- cause anyone that "Crashes" a friendly system is a true asshole in every respect of the word. Its ok, though, if the SysOp is a dickshit, then you can relax. If you plan on using this then you should be more specific so others will know just what type of things you crash (Disks, Autos, Windows etc).
Now, this is a great word to use in your name, if you hack that is. Hacking is considered by many of the ignorant people of this blasphemed world to be a threat to society. Granted we have some assholes out there who try to be Mr Wargames himself, but there are many "hackers" that do not fit that crude description. Many "Hackers" are only out to satisfy their curiosity and a lot of places could benefit from hackers if they (the places) would just quit being such paranoid assholes. In other words, "Hacker" (if you are) is quite a noble word to help enhance your alias. Just put some thought into it. One good example Ive seen is "The Ubiquitous Hacker" (famed Mender of Catfur 2.2, remember?) or the "Unknown Hacker".
I myself dont approve of these being used in part of a nickname, however, you may disagree. I never said you had to agree with anything in here. A good phreak is noticed by his actions, his manners, and his information. Putting the word "Phreak" or "Phreek" (which is a stupid spelling for a derivative) in your name makes it look like you are trying to call too much attention to it. If you wish to have a name that is relevant to phreaking then take some of your jargon and work with that, you know, something dealing with PBXs or WATS extenders, or some bogus company that you guys rip off day in and day out such as MCI, SPRINT or AT&T. If youre still at a loss then you should pick up your phone (if youve passed that stage), dial 0, and ask the nice lady on the other end what her name is and try that.
The word "Rad" or any form of it in your name would tend to have people believe that you are some type of mad partying, incredibly popular person. Well, 90% of modemers know that 90% of modemers are probably scrawny little losers (if youre offended then eat some protein or twinkies, geek), 9.5% know that 9.5% are pretty damn cool people who have plenty of other things to do, but get a kick, and at times a challenge out of some of the things associated with modeming (theft, drugs, etc). The other .5% either just got their new Micromodem ][e for Christmas or are somewhere way out in left field picking their nose, so unless you are truly "Rad" then you might want to shop elsewhere.